Handlebars and segways, some of my favourite things

I love the handlebars in the handicapped toilet. When I grow old, I want handlebars like that in my toilet. The way I've been recklessly plopping myself on the seat, it is only a matter of time that my derriere will one day miss its mark and fall right in. I also want a multi-terrain segway, or a walking stick, or a trolley with a butler. If you cannot tell by now, I'm having mobility issues.

Kops and Reno have both suggested that I go for a swim or brisk walk to aid the recovery process. What a good idea. Now if I can just remember how to walk...